Serious case of the blues

I tried not to let today turn into a pity party.  I threw myself into dusting my house.  I swear every single surface has been dusted, shined and buffed.  I still haven't vacuumed but that can wait.  I just did the floors 2 days ago.

In fun news I used Facetime for the first time today.  It's the BFF's birthday today!!!  For a couple months we are the same age.  I called to wish her well and she shared the rumpus room from her view.  Danyal's little face lit up when he saw auntie on the phone!  He was marching and singing and coming up giving me kisses on the phone and telling me he loved me.  Sara was slightly more reserved, but still giggled and said hi, and poured me tea and ran around like the monkey she is.  They totally made my day.

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The DD (debbie downer) re-surfaced today with 2 text messages and a message via FB.  She begged again for me to tell her what she did wrong.  Rather than send the previous letter I had written, I wrote another.

Here it is:


There isn't any one thing you did or didn't do.  I have realized recently that I've out grown several friendships, one of them being ours.  I am not the same person I was 10+ years ago when we met.  I know you aren't either.  However I feel I've changed a lot more than you have.

I analyzed our last several meetings and found that they were not fulfilling to me and not serving to make me happy.  Honestly, the last time I left your house, almost 2 yrs ago, I cried the whole way home because I was so frustrated and sad with how you treated me.

Over the last year I've stopped responding intentionally.  I have nothing of value to say, particularly when I offer advice and you don't take it or even seem to value it.  When I did respond I kept the focus on whatever it was you texted about.  I was no longer comfortable sharing the details of my life with you.

I need to take care of myself.  Part of caring for me, is to make me happy and our time together no longer fulfills me or my happiness.  I do not wish to continue our friendship and hope you understand and respect my wishes.

As I've typed this out she responded:

• Well I wish you well then.
• Maybe one day you'll realize that it's about more than making yourself happy, it's about being there for a friend even when you may not support every single thing that they do.
• I was always there for you and supported you. It is sad you chose not to do the same. Good luck to you, I hope you find whatever it is you are looking for.

I guess this is better than what I anticipated.  She claims she's a big bad ass bitch now so this is quite a dignified response.  Let's hope it's all over now.  I know I'm happily moving on!  Might be time for some wine.